How to Read a Hebrew Tombstone

*Information obtained from JewishGen InfoFile

Jewish tombstones with Hebrew inscriptions have an added value to genealogists, in that they not only show the date of death and sometimes the age or date of birth, but they also include the given name of the deceased's father.  This permits you to go back one more generation.

Here are a few helpful pointers if you cannot read Hebrew.

At the top of most Jewish tombstones is the abbreviation פּ'נ, which stands for po nikbar or po nitman, meaning “here lies”.

At the end of many Hebrew tombstone inscriptions you will find the abbreviation ת נ צ ב ה, which is an abbreviation of a verse from the Bible, the first book of Samuel, 25:29, “May his soul be bound up in the bond of eternal life”.

If any Hebrew characters at all are written on a tombstone, they are most likely to be the person's Hebrew name.  A Hebrew name always includes a patronymic, the person's father's given name.  This is a unique feature of Jewish tombstones, and a great boon to Jewish genealogy.

The Hebrew word בן, ben, means “son of”, as in “Yaakov ben Yitzhak”, meaning “Yaakov, the son of Yitzhak”.  The Hebrew word בת, bat, means “daughter of”.  On tombstones, these words will often appear as ב'ר, an abbreviation for ben reb, meaning “son (or daughter) of

the worthy”, followed by the father's given name.  The word reb is a simple honorific, a title of respect, akin to “Mr.” — it does not mean Rabbi.

The Jewish Calendar

Dates are written in Hebrew according to the Jewish calendar.  This calendar, which starts its “year one” with the Creation of the World, was probably designed by the patriarch Hillel II in the fourth century.  He calculated the age of the world by computing the literal ages of biblical characters and other events in the Bible, and came up with a calendar that begins 3760 years before the Christian calendar.

Years:
The letters of the Hebrew Alphabet each have a numerical value, specified in the chart on the left.  When a Hebrew date is written, you must figure out the numerical value of each letter and then add them up.  This is the date according to the Jewish calendar, not the calendar we use in every day life, known as the Gregorian calendar (also referred to as the Common Era, civil or Christian calendar).  In September 2009, for example, the Jewish year was 5769.  Given a Hebrew date, you need to do only a little bit of math to change the Hebrew year into a secular year.

Often a Hebrew date after the year 5000 on the Jewish calendar will leave off five thousand.  For example, the Hebrew year 5680 will be written as 680 rather than 5680.  To compute the civil (Gregorian) year, simply add the number 1240 to the shortened Hebrew year.

Here's one example: If the year is written as תרפג, the letter ת is 400, the letter ר is 200, פ is 80, and ג is 3.  400 + 200 + 80 + 3 = 683.  The 5000 is usually left off, so the actual year would be 5683.  By using our formula, 683 plus 1240 is 1923.  That is the civil year.

Months:
The Hebrew year begins on Rosh Hashanah, which occurs on the Gregorian calendar in September or October.  Therefore, the dates listed for the months of Tishri, Heshvan, Kislev and sometimes Tevet must be read as applying to the preceding year of the civil (Gregorian) calendar.

Converting Calendar Dates:
The complete transposition of a Hebrew date to a Gregorian date uses a very complex formula.  It is easiest to simply refer to one of the published or online reference works, such as:

The Comprehensive Hebrew Calendar, 5703-5860, 1943-2100, by Arthur Spier (Jerusalem, New York: Feldheim Publishers, 1981); or 150 Year Calendar, by Rabbi Moses Greenfield (Brooklyn: Hotsaat Ateret, 1987).

Most synagogues and Jewish libraries possess one of these works.  Another alternative is to use one of several computer programs: JCAL, Hebcal, Tichnut; Steve Morse's “ Jewish Calendar Conversions in One Step”; or JewishGen's online JOS calculator (https://www.jewishgen.org/jos).  These programs can convert Hebrew to Gregorian dates and vice versa, as well as display calendars and Yahrzeit dates for any year.
For more information about the Jewish calendar, see the JewishGen InfoFile Introduction to the Jewish Calendar.

Some Hebrew Phrases

In addition to names and dates, here are the common Hebrew words which appear on tombstones:

Here lies po nikbar
                                                                                

Son of                  ben

Daughter of         bat

Title, i.e. "Mr." reb, rav    

Son/Daughter      ben reb
of the honored 
                                                                             

The Levite ha-levi

The Cohen           ha-kohen

The Rabbi ha-rav
                                                                              

Dear, Beloved (masc.) ha-yakar

Dear, Beloved (fem.) ha-y'karah
                                                                              

Father                  av

My father            avi

Our father          avinu

Mother                eem

My mother         eemi

Our mother         emanu

My husband        baali

My wife               ishti

Brother               akh

My brother          akhi

Our brother         akhinu

Sister                   akhot

Aunt                    dodah

Uncle                   dod
                                                                             

Man                                      ish

Woman                                ishah

Woman (unmarried) b'tulah

Woman (married "Mrs." marat

Old (masc., fem.) zakain, z'kaina
   
Child (masc., fem.) yeled, yaldah
   
Young man/woman bakhur, bakhurah
                                                                                           

Died (masc., fem.) niftar, nifterah    

Born (masc., fem.) nolad, noldah    
                                                                                         

Year, Years                            shanah, shanim    

Day, Days                             yom, yamim    

Month                                   khodesh

First of the month rosh khodesh
                                                                                          
 
Hebrew Abbreviations on Tombstones:
There are many many different Hebrew abbreviations that are found in tombstone inscriptions and Hebrew literature.  Abbreviations are usually indicated by a quote mark or an apostrophe.  Often, the apostrophe is used to abbreviate a single word, whereas the quote mark indicates an abbreviated phrase.  For more information, see the following works:

“Hebrew Abbreviations for Genealogists”, by Edmund U. Cohler, Ph.D., in Mass-Pocha (Newsletter of the Jewish Genealogical Society of Greater Boston).
    - Part I: IV,1 (Winter 1994/95), pages 4-7.
    - Part II: IV,2 (Spring 1995), pages 14-18.
    - Part III: IV,3 (Summer 1995), pages 16-17.

Hüttenmeister, Frowald Gil.  Abkürzungsverzeichnis hebräischer Grabinschriften.  (Frankfurt am Main: Gesellschaft zur Forderung Judaistischer Studien in Frankfurt am Main [Society for Furthering Judaic Studies in Frankfurt am Main], 1996).  349 pages.  {Frankfurter judaistische Studien, Volume 11.  In Hebrew and German.  Hebrew title: Otsar rashe tevot ve-kitsurim be-matsvot bate ha-almin}.  ISBN #3-922056-08-3.  OCLC 925532369.

“Reading Hebrew Matzevot Key Words, Abbreviations, & Acronyms”, compiled by Dr. Ronald D. Doctor. (June 2008).  21 pages.  http://www.rootsweb.ancestry.com/~orjgs/Abrrev.pdf.

Symbols on Tombstones:
In addition to the inscription, symbols on the tombstone can be clues.

Two hands, with four fingers each divided into two sets of two fingers, is the symbol of a priestly blessing — this signifies a Kohen, a descendant of the biblical high priest Aaron.

A pitcher signifies a Levite — in ancient days, members of the tribe of Levi were responsible for cleaning the hands of the Temple priest.

A candle or candelabra often is used on the tombstone of a woman; and the six-pointed Star of David on that of a man.

A broken branch or tree stump motif on a tombstone often signifies someone who died young, whose life was cut short.

Bibliography:

• Kurzweil, Arthur.  From Generation to Generation: How to Trace Your Jewish Genealogy and Personal History.  (New York: HarperCollins, 1994).  Chapter 9, pages 342-358.  OCLC 823528084.
• DOROT, The Journal of the Jewish Genealogical Society (New York):
    - XI, 2 (Winter 1989-90), pp 2-3: “Getting the Most Out of Your Cemetery Visit”.
    - XI, 4 (Summer 1990), pg 16; and XII, 1 (Autumn 1990), pg 8: “Tools of the Trade”.
• Krajewska, Monika.  A Tribe of Stones: Jewish Cemeteries in Poland.  (Warsaw: Polish Scientific Publishers, 1993).  242 pages.  {Mostly illustrations}.  OCLC 925571139.
• Rath, Gideon.  “Hebrew Tombstone Inscriptions and Dates”, in Chronicles (Newsletter of the Jewish Genealogical Society of Philadelphia), Vol. 5, No. 1 (Spring 1986), pages 1-4.
• Schafer, Louis S.  Tombstones of Your Ancestors.  (Bowie, MD: Heritage Books, 1991, 2007).  160 pages, paperback.  {Doesn't deal specifically with Jewish tombstones}.  OCLC 233523010.
• Schwartzman, Arnold.  Graven images: Graphic Motifs of the Jewish Gravestone.  (New York: H.N. Abrams, 1993).  144 pages.  OCLC 891405959.
• Strangstad, Lynette.  A Graveyard Preservation Primer.  (Nashville, Tenn.: Association for Gravestone Studies, 1988, 1995, 2013).  126 pages.  OCLC 1007570142.
• Association for Gravestone Studies, 278 Main Street, Suite 207, Greenfield, MA 01301.   (413) 772-0836.   {Produces a quarterly newsletter, Markers, and access to a lending library.}   https://www.gravestonestudies.org.
• Caplan, Judith Shulamit Langer-Surnamer.  “Tombstone Translation Topics: How to Decipher and Read a Hebrew Tombstone”.  In: 19th Annual Conference on Jewish Genealogy: Syllabus.  (New York: Jewish Genealogical Society, 1999), pages 217-221.   Also In Jewish Genealogy Yearbook 2000 (20th International Conference on Jewish Genealogy, Salt Lake City, IAJGS, 2000), Section 1, pages 80-84.

Links:
International Association of Jewish Genealogical Societies (IAJGS) Cemetery Project:
    · Inventory of Jewish cemetery locations worldwide.
    · http://www.iajgsjewishcemeteryproject.org.

JewishGen Online Worldwide Burial Registry (JOWBR):
    · Database of three million Jewish burial records, from 7,800 cemeteries in 128 countries.
    · https://www.jewishgen.org/databases/cemetery.

Jewish Cemeteries in the New York Metropolitan Area (JGSNY):
    · List of Cemeteries  ·  Map  ·  Travel Directions  ·  Burial Societies.

Copyright ©1996, 2001, 2013 by Warren Blatt.
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646.494.5972 | info@jewishgen.org | © 2019, JewishGen. All rights reserved.

Irish Death Superstitions

Irish Death Superstitions

1.  The hand of a corpse was believed to be a cure for all diseases.  Sick people would be brought to a house where a corpse was laid out so that the hand could be laid on them.

2. The candles used at funerals were also thought to have curative powers. The butts of the candles would be saved to cure burns. Another Irish cure for burns is said to be raw potato.

3. Nettles gathered from a churchyard and boiled down were believed to cure water retention when boiled down into a drink.

4. It is believed that the souls of the dead that die abroad, wish to be buried in Ireland. The dead will not rest peaceably unless buried with their forefathers and people of their own kind.

5. The spirit of the dead last buried has to watch in the churchyard until another corpse is buried.

Duties include carrying water for the dead that are waiting in Purgatory. This keeps them very busy. Purgatory is a very hot place. This superstition has been known to cause fights when two funeral processions try to enter the same churchyard at the same time. No one wants their loved one to be the last buried and have to perform these duties.

6. If anyone stumbles at a grave it is considered a bad omen. If you fall and touch the ground you will most likely die by the end of the year.

7. If you meet a funeral you must turn back and walk at least four steps with the mourners.

8. If the nearest relative touches the hand of a corpse it will shout out a wild cry if not quite dead.

9. On Twelfth Night the dead walk the Earth. On every tile of your house a soul is sitting waiting for your prayers to take it out of purgatory.

10. If a magpie comes to your door and looks at you it is a sure sign of death. Nothing can be done to avert the doom.

11. When a swarm of bees suddenly quits the hive it is a sign that death is hovering near the house.

12. Similarly the corner of the sheet used to wrap a corpse was used to cure a headache or a swollen limb.

13. When someone dies you should close the curtains because should a moonbeam shine through the window onto the corpse or coffin then the devil sends his demons down it to steal the soul.

14. Stop all clocks at the time of death to confuse the devil and give the soul time to reach heaven.

15. In Ireland the dead are carried out of the house feet first, in order to prevent the spirit from looking back into the house and beckoning another member of the family to follow him.

16. Family photographs were also sometimes turned face-down to prevent any of the close relatives and friends of the deceased from being possessed by the spirit of the dead.

17. Cover all mirrors at the time of a death in the house or the soul will be trapped within the mirror.

Superstitions About the Dead, Dying, Graves & Cemeteries

Superstitions About the Dead, Dying, Graves & Cemeteries

(Gathered from various sources)

Superstitions About The Dying

• Sudden deaths, especially ones with delirium, are attributed to witchcraft.
• If two people in the same house are sick, and one dies, the other will improve in health.
• If a person has a prolonged or painful death, he will haunt the survivors, so all attempts are made to make the passing have as little suffering as possible.
• The bed of a gravely ill person should never be placed north and south, and always east and west, with the head toward the west. This will speed the process of dying and reduce suffering.
• It was thought that a person could not die on a mattress with feathers of wild fowl, so when someone was dying a slow death, the person would sometimes be carried to a different mattress to ease the suffering.
• The last person’s name called by the dying will be the next to follow in death.
• You will die if a dying person hits or bites you. In order to prevent your own death, you must hit or bite them back in the same place.
• At the beginning of the year, if the first person to die in a community is elderly, the community will suffer from many of the elderly passing.

Superstitions Concerning Death & Mirrors

• As soon as death occurs, the mirrors and pictures in the room should be covered or turned where they can’t be looked upon. It is bad luck to let the reflection of the corpse be seen in the mirror. Some people believe it is bad luck to see your own reflection in the mirror until the corpse is taken out of the home.
• Some others believe that if mirrors are not covered, they will never be able to be fully cleaned again. A variation on that states that the reflection of the corpse may never leave the mirrors or pictures. A European tradition says that if you look into the mirror before the body is removed, you can see the deceased looking over your shoulder.

Death and Clocks

• Clocks were stopped upon the death of a person in a home to show the departed that “time was over” for him or her. If the head of the household dies, it is particularly important to stop the clocks, lest all the other inhabitants of the home die as well. (E) Others believed that once a clock in the house with a dead person ran down, they would never work again. (AA)

Death, Bees & Fruit Trees

• When the head of the household dies, one must go out and whisper the news of the death to the bees, or all in the home will meet the same fate. Bees were believed in ages past to be the messengers of the gods, so when informed, bees would take the news to them.
• Likewise, if the deceased cared for an orchard or any fruit trees, they must be informed of the passing, or all in the household will decay.

Superstitions About Death and Preparation

• As soon as the person is dead and in the clothes in which they are to be buried, a dish of salt should be put on their chest to keep evil spirits off. It is also said to help prevent swelling and putrefaction.
• If the body of the deceased is limp for some time after death, another member of the family will soon follow.
• None of the family of the dead should help prepare the body for burial, or ill luck will follow.
• Coins were often placed over the eyes of the deceased to keep them from coming open. If the eyes of the corpse remained open, he was said to be looking for a “follower”, and another death would soon happen.
• Sweeping the home before the corpse is taken out will ensure that the person who does so will be the next to die.
• Likewise, removing the bed clothes from the home before the corpse ensures that another member of the family will soon die.
• A European belief is that the intestines of the deceased will rumble when the body is touched by his murderer. Also, that blood will flow from the bones when touched by the murderer, regardless of how old the corpse is. Another superstition says that if a corpse’s nose bleeds, it is a sign that the murderer is in the room.
• Do not put the clothes of a living person on a corpse. That person will die once the clothes decay.
• If you shave with a dead man’s razor, your beard will turn prematurely gray.

Superstitions About Death & Burial

• A corpse should leave any home or building feet-first, or else the corpse would be looking back at the building and calling for someone within to follow him in death.
• Touching the corpse will ensure that the ghost of the dead will not haunt you. A variation says that touching the corpse on the forehead assures you will not dream of the dead.
• Taking a corpse to the cemetery in your own vehicle is extremely bad luck.
• The corpse should not pass over any part of the same road twice.
• If the funeral procession stops on its way to the cemetery, another death will soon follow.
• Counting the cars in a funeral procession is ill advised, as it is said you are simply counting the days until your own death.
• Take care that you do not see your reflection in a hearse, or you will be the next to be carried in it.
• Going ahead of the funeral procession or passing a funeral procession is very bad luck, and death will soon follow if you do. It used to be believed that carrying a baby in a funeral procession would ensure that it would die before its first birthday.
• If a black cat crosses in front of a funeral procession, there will be a death in the family of the deceased within three days.
• Some fascinating American superstitions involve the burial of people who have been murdered. Some believed that burying the victim face-down would prevent the murderer from leaving the area in which the victim was buried. Others believed that burying the liver separately from the body would ensure that the murderer would be caught near the place the liver was buried!

Graves and Cemeteries

• Graves should be dug east to west. Superstition over time has varied on which direction the head should be laid. Many say the head of the deceased should be laid towards the west. In general, it is so the soul will not be lost at the Resurrection. One reason given for this is so the dead won’t have to turn around when Gabriel blows the trumpet during revelation. Still others believe the head should face the east, as that is the direction of the star that shone at the birth of Jesus.
• Graves should never be left open overnight. It will lead to another death. It is ideal to dig and close a grave all on the day of the burial.
• If a grave is left open over Sunday, another death will occur before the next Sunday.
• The shovels and other tools used to dig a grave used to be left at the grave site for a day or more after the burial, as moving them too soon would bring bad luck (AA).
• If the casket slips while it is being lowered into the grave, another death will soon follow.
• Leaving the grave before it is filled will welcome another death to follow.
• If it rains into the open grave, bad luck will come to a member of the deceased’s family.
• Likewise, being the first to leave the cemetery is bad luck and could bring you death. Another similar superstition stated that the sex of the first person to leave the cemetery would be the sex of the next person to die.
• Another member of the family will soon die if the earth covering a grave sinks in.
• It is bad luck to step over a grave, and bad luck to point at a grave.
• Visiting a cemetery after dark will bring you bad luck.

Superstitions About the After Life

• If lightning strikes the house of the dying, the devil has come to claim them.
• If a person dies with their mouth and eyes open, they will go to hell.
• To dream of a deceased person in an agitated state means that they are in hell. Likewise, to dream of them in a pleasant state means they have gone to Heaven.
• If it rains shortly after a person is buried, it means that the person has found eternal rest and happiness. A variation on this superstition says that thunder after a funeral shows the deceased has gone to Heaven.
• If a turtle-dove flies upward after a death, the soul of the deceased will go to heaven.

Victorian Funeral Customs and Superstitions

Victorian Funeral Customs and Superstitions

Curtains would be drawn and clocks would be stopped at the time of death. Mirrors were covered with crape or veiling to prevent the deceased’s spirit from getting trapped in the looking glass.  A wreath of laurel, yew or boxwood tied with crape or black ribbons was hung on the front door to alert passersby that a death had occurred. The body was watched over every minute until burial, hence the custom of “waking”.  The wake also served as a safeguard from burying someone who was not dead, but in a coma.  Most wakes also lasted 3-4 days to allow relatives to arrive from far away. The use of flowers and candles helped to mask unpleasant odors in the room before embalming became common. In 19th century Europe and America the dead were carried out of the house feet first, in order to prevent the spirit from looking back into the house and beckoning another member of the family to follow him.  Family photographs were also sometimes turned face-down to prevent any of the close relatives and friends of the deceased from being possessed by the spirit of the dead.

Grave robbery by the “Resurrectionist Men”, often doctors themselves was a problem in the 19th century as medical schools needed fresh cadavers for dissection classes.  “Bricking-over” a grave was a way of guaranteeing some security after death. The fear of a loved one being buried alive inspired coffin makers to design warning systems such as a bell on the grave which was connected by a chain to the inside of the coffin in cases of premature burial, thus the expression, “Saved by the bell.”  Small cakes, known as “funeral biscuits” were wrapped in white paper and sealed with black sealing wax and given to guests as favors. Lavish meals, or collations, were often served after internment. Burial usually followed four days after death.

In many cemeteries, the vast majority of graves are oriented in such a manner that the bodies lie with their heads to the West and their feet to the East. This very old custom appears to originate with the Pagan sun worshippers, but is primarily attributed to Christians who believe that the final summons to Judgment will come from the East.

Personal stationery and handkerchiefs carried a black border, with a wide border indicating a very recent death.

White was a popular color for the funeral of a child. White gloves, ostrich plumes and a white coffin were the standard.

Superstitions

If the deceased has lived a good life, flowers would bloom on his grave; but if he has been evil, only weeds would grow.

If several deaths occur in the same family, tie a black ribbon to everything left alive that enters the house, even dogs and chickens. This will protect against deaths spreading further.

Never wear anything new to a funeral, especially shoes.

You should always cover your mouth while yawning so your spirit doesn’t leave you and the devil never enters your body.

Stop the clock in a death room or you will have bad luck.

To lock the door of your home after a funeral procession has left the house is bad luck.

If rain falls on a funeral procession, the deceased will go to heaven.

If you hear a clap of thunder following a burial it indicates that the soul of the departed has reached heaven.

If you hear 3 knocks and no one is there, it usually means someone close to you has died. The superstitious call this the 3 knocks of death. 

It is bad luck to meet a funeral procession head on. If you see one approaching, turn around.  If this is unavoidable, hold on to a button until the funeral cortege passes.

Large drops of rain warn that there has just been a death.

If you leave something that belongs to you to the deceased, that means the person will come back to get you.

If a firefly/lightning bug gets into your house someone will soon die.

If you smell roses when none are around someone is going to die.

 If you don’t hold your breath while going by a graveyard you will not be buried.

If you see yourself in a dream, your death will follow.

If you see an owl in the daytime, there will be a death.

If you dream about a birth, someone you know will die.

If it rains in an open grave then someone in the family will die within the year.

If a bird pecks on your window or crashes into one that there has been a death.

If a sparrow lands on a piano, someone in the home will die.

If a picture falls off the wall, there will be a death of someone you know.

If you spill salt, throw a pinch of the spilt salt over your shoulder to prevent death.

Never speak ill of the dead because they will come back to haunt you or you will suffer misfortune.

Two deaths in the family means that a third is sure to follow.

The cry of a curlew or the hoot of an owl foretells a death.

A single snowdrop growing in the garden foretells a death.

Having only red and white flowers together in a vase (especially in hospital) means a death will soon follow.

Dropping an umbrella on the floor or opening one in the house means that there will be a murder in the house.

A diamond-shaped fold in clean linen portends death.

A dog howling at night when someone in the house is sick is a bad omen. It can be reversed by reaching under the bed and turning over a shoe.

Information Gathered From Friends of Oak Grove Cemetery

Mourning in the Georgian Era

Mourning in the Georgian Era

by Geri Walton

Everyone is usually familiar with Victorian mourning and its strict etiquette and rules. Mourning in the Georgian Era also had rules associated with it and those rules varied. For instance, in 1782 there was no general mourning when Prince Alfred died as etiquette established “never to go into mourning for any of the blood-royal of England under 14 years of age, unless [they were] … the heir-apparent.” When the Princess Dowager died, mourning lasted six months and theatres were closed for three weeks, whereas when Princess Amelia of Great Britain died in 1786 the mourning period lasted six weeks and theatres were closed for a mere ten days.

Georgians, just like Victorians, wore black when in mourning. Black was worn to denote privation of life,” as black was considered the “privation of light.” The Irish author and satirist Jonathan Swift noted that despite wearing black, Georgian Era mourning was sometimes neither strict nor somber. He demonstrated this when he wrote that “he always observed the merriest faces in mourning coaches.” One gentleman added to Swift’s comment that “black clothes are but seldom accompanied with sorrowful countenances.” The gentleman also maintained that at least two women he knew, who had not recently lost a relative, became “very  “the melancholy” as mourning clothes were of “great advantage to their complexions.”

The two melancholy women mentioned above were not the only ones to show improper decorum when it came to mourning. For instance, it was reported that a man named Sir Henry Lovejoy went to a new play “in black and weepers; and though he had buried his wife but a week, he laughed as hearty as if he was to have been married the next day.” There was also a certain lady who reputedly danced at Cornelys’ just a fortnight after her husband’s death, and a son whose father had so severely restricted his finances, that upon the father’s death the son “immediately rifled the strong box … and swore he would not return home till his father was buried, and every farthing spent.”

Although some Georgians were willing to abide by proper etiquette and rules when it came to mourning, one Georgian gentleman in 1769 felt that disrespectful mourning had gotten out of hand. He wrote to the editor of the Town and Country Magazine hoping to improve the decorum of Georgian mourners. He stated that if that happened “foreigners will no longer be able to twit us with all want of decency; and we shall approach a little more towards rational beings.” He also offered various rules and etiquette for Georgians mourners, and provided a bit of humor with it. He suggested his ideas be used by wives mourning for their husbands, husbands mourning for their wives, and heirs mourning for their fathers.

Here are his suggestions:

Wives Mourning for Their Husbands:

• The first week wives were not to appear in public.
• They were also not to be without a handkerchief, even in private.
• The second Sunday they were to be “much affected with the sermon; the handkerchief not omitted.”
• After the first month, the widowed wife could attend a tragedy and then “weep in character, either at the play, or the loss of her husband.”
• The second month, she was allowed to attend a comedy and she could “smile but not languishingly.”
• The third month, allowed for laughter at a play or dancing at Cornelys’ with her perspective bridegroom.
• The fourth month permitted her to jump into her intended arms, and “finish her widow-hood.

Husband’s Mourning for Their Wives:

• The husband was directed to “weep, or seem to weep at the funeral.”
• He could not be seen at the chocolate house for the first week and was supposed to provide a “proper sigh whenever good wives, or even matrimony [was] mentioned.”
• The third week allowed for a mistress, if he did not have one.
• The fourth week he could appear in public.
• The second month he could obtain more mistresses if he chose not to marry, as mistresses supposedly provided solace for his melancholy.

Heirs Mourning for Their Fathers:

• The heir was instructed not to leave before the funeral ended, although horses, dogs, and equipages could be readied for his departure.
• The disposition of the estate, gardens, etc. could be examined.
• Additional servants could be hired if needed and they could be put into mourning.
• Immediately after the funeral women were allowed to call on the heir or he could visit them.
• The heir could also frequent the “gaming table [or] get admitted [as] a member of the Jockey Club [or] the Franciscan Friars.”
• Finally, if not ruined by too early expiration of his mourning, he could also discard his mourning dress.

Of course, not everyone was so lighthearted when it came to death and mourning. Public figures had epic funerals and associated with them was epic mourning. For instance, when Horatio Nelson, 1st Viscount Nelson, died, besides a specific order in which the funeral procession was to proceed, there were numerous mourning coaches and his body was covered with a black velvet pall. Nelson’s servants were also “in mourning” and rode in a “mourning coach,” and at least one mourning coach bore several gentlemen “in their full uniform coats, with black cloth waistcoats, breeches, and black stockings, and crape round their arms and hats.” In 1798, there was a report of a woman dressed in deep mourning who had lost her husband and two sons in the war. She hoped to present a petition to the majesties but was prevented, although she eventually succeeded in throwing her petition into their carriage, where it fell upon Princess Elizabeth’s lap.

Mourning rules were also associated with families, relatives, and servants in the Georgian Era. In the Life of Harriot Stuart, written in 1750 by the English poet and authoress, Charlotte Lennox, she noted:

“[The] length of time devoted to mourning, and the apparent intensity with which one mourned, were determined to a large extent by the relationship that … existed between the two people and the ‘public knowledge of that relationship’ … mourning was usually only done for kindred, and … the formal rules that governed mourning, which specified an exact amount of time for each degree of kinship, ‘showed that servants were excluded from family.'”

This meant that mourning by any employer for one of their servant’s, indicated their relationship was more of a friendship than mere employer and domestic.

References:

Annual Register, Vol. 1798, 1800

Friday’s Post, in Ipswich Journal, pg. 2, 24 August 1782

“Friday’s Post and Express,” in Norfolk Chronicle, pg. 4, 2 October 1790

Lennox, Charlotte, The Life of Harriot Stuart, Written by Herself, 1750

The European Magazine and London Review, Vol. 49, 1769

The Order to be Observed in the Public Funeral Procession of the Late Vice-Admiral Horatio Viscount Nelson, Vol. 8, 1806

“Wednesday & Thursday’s Posts,” in Northampton Mercury, pg. 2, 4 November 1786

Urban, Sylvanus, The Gentleman’s Magazine and Historical Chronicle, 1806

Funerals in Eighteenth Century Virginia

FUNERALS IN EIGHTEENTH CENTURY VIRGINIA

A Research Report by Thad Tate

Colonial Williamsburg, Inc.  (1956)

Funerals in colonial Virginia were to some extent social as well as solemn occasions. The friends and relatives of a dead person had often gathered at his plantation from considerable distances. Once they had made the tedious journey, they might expect to stay several days. The necessity of feeding them during this time meant that a certain amount of feasting became an expected part of the funeral. Even in cases where people did not come from so far off, at least one meal was in all probability provided for those who were present.

Drinking was also quite common at seventeenth century funerals and may have continued with some frequency into the eighteenth. However, there was an obvious reaction just prior to 1700 against the huge amounts of liquor being consumed at funerals. Some people even began to specify in their wills that nothing to drink should be provided, and so the practice may have moderated somewhat. There are, however, other evidences, such as the three gallons of wine and nineteen gallons of other spirits provided at the burial of one John McClanahan in 1774, that drinking was still prevalent at Virginia funerals.

The funeral service for a member of the planter class or for some other person of wealth and position customarily was quite elaborate. The attendance vas usually large. Near relatives and a good many more distant ones; friends and fellow planters; humbler neighbors from near-by small farms; and the servants and slaves of the plantation were all likely to be present. Those closest to the dead wore some indication of mourning, either full mourning clothes or a black ribbon or armband. They might also have been left mourning rings and mourning gloves by the will of the dead person.

Funerals usually took place at home, and there was considerable resistance to the idea of holding them in church. Likewise the church graveyards were largely for the burial of transients or persons who lived very close to the church. A family burying ground in the garden or at some other convenient location on the plantation was much more popular. Hugh Jones' Present State of Virginia (1724) describes these preferences very succinctly:

The Parishes being of great Extent (some sixty Miles long and upwards) many dead Corpses cannot be conveyed to the Church to be buried: So that it is customary to bury in Gardens or Orchards, where whole Families lye interred together, in a Spot generally handsomely enclosed, planted with Evergreens, and the Graves kept decently: Hence likewise arises the Occasion of preaching Funeral Sermons In Houses, where at Funerals are assembled a great Congregation of Neighbours and Friends; and if you insist upon having the Sermon and Ceremony at Church, they'll say they will be without it, unless performed after their usual Custom.

As Jones' description indicates there was a funeral sermon delivered by the rector of the parish, not too different from modern funeral sermons except for its greater length. The clergyman would also read the Anglican Order for the Burial of the Dead as it appears in the English Prayer Book of 1662, this being the prayer book in use in the colonies from that date until the end of the Revolution. The vestments worn by the clergyman would depend upon whether he wore his ordinary habit or dressed as he would have for a service in the church. If in street attire he would have worn a long cassock, cincture (sash), gown or black or grey coat, tippet (long black scarf), a soft black square cap or a black cocked hat, a large wig, and bands (a soft white linen neckcloth with two pendant tabs. Vested for church he would have exchanged the gown or coat for a linen surplice, probably at this time one which buttoned up the front and was full and long. He would have removed the tippet and then probably have put it back on over the surplice together with a hood. His hat, of course, would be removed.

The one or two contemporary illustrations which are available here strongly suggest that in the case of a funeral a clergyman would have appeared in ordinary habit rather than wearing a surplice. The cassock would, however, certainly stamp him distinctly as a cleric. As illustrations of eighteenth century clerical dress we have in our files color slides of a former member of the staff correctly vested and standing in the pulpit of Bruton Parish. There are also several contemporary illustrations, mostly English but certainly applicable, in our Graphic Arts File. A list of these has been compiled and will be held for use, if needed.

It is probable that the parish clerk might have been present at any funeral to assist the clergyman with responses, etc., since he is specifically mentioned as one of the persons to be included in the funeral procession in several wills. Like the clergyman he wore a cassock, bands, and wig.

It is clear from the contemporary records that Virginians made a sharp distinction between the funeral and the burial, much more so than today when the two words are often interchangeable in popular usage. The funeral referred to the gathering of mourners for the sermon and other suitable memorials. The burial involved only the actual interment of the body. It was moreover possible to separate these two parts of the service by intervals or as much as several weeks, especially if the deceased had requested a more or less private burial.

There is some indication of the firing of guns at Virginia funerals. However, this seems largely to have been a seventeenth-century custom. There was, for instance, a 1655 law in the colony against the wasting or powder at entertainments, but weddings and funerals were both exempted from its restrictions. There is much less evidence of this custom in the eighteenth century; so it probably should not be included in any representation of a funeral of the later colonial period.

Where the funeral and the burial were observed at the same time or where the burial was not private, some sort of procession from the house or church to the burying ground took place with a greater or lesser degree of ceremony. The following, which describes the funeral of Col. John Hutchings of Norfolk in 1768, is undoubtedly a rather elaborate procession:

He was yesterday carried to the place of interment by six reputable tradesmen, his pall supported by six Aldermen, preceded by a party of the militia with their muskets clubbed, muffled drums, and mourning banners, and was followed by a numerous offspring, a great number of relations, and a very great concourse of people of all ranks and degrees.

A much simpler procession would have been that of Mrs. Elizabeth Stith, a wealthy widow of Isle of Wight County, whose will specified that she should have "a decent burial, with only my relations and near neighbors at it; and that the parson and clark with the four men that bear me to the grave shall have hat bands and gloves;…"

The following account by a traveler in Virginia in the 1780's, Robert Banter, gives a rather full description of a funeral — and a fairly elaborate one — which took place some weeks after the actual burial:

This morning I dressed myself in mourning to go to poor Mr. Hopper's funeral with Mr. George McCall. It's the custom in this part or the country to have the funeral service performed two or three weeks after the person is buried — a very foolish one in my opinion, as it only serves to renew the grief of the relations. People were invited all the way from James River to it [this apparently occurred near Tappahannock]. Mr. Mathews, the parson who married them about six weeks ago, read the service. As soon as it was over, the ladies walked into one room and the gentlemen into another, where a table was spread with funeral cake and wine sealed with black. After this followed a cold dinner. Neither Mrs. Ritchie nor Mrs. Hopper appeared…

Many of the descriptions of funerals and burials which do survive are those of extremely elaborate rites. Two of the best accounts, for instance, are those of the funerals for Lord Botetourt, the next to last royal governor, and for Peyton Randolph, the Speaker of the House of Burgesses, who died attending the Continental Congress at Philadelphia. but was returned to Williamsburg for burial. These were exceptional; they might well have been the two most ceremonious funerals in the entire history of colonial Virginia. But, as the evidence above might suggest, even the death of the average planter often called for a funeral attended by a large gathering and marked by a high degree of formal ceremony.

At the same time there was a counter-movement in the direction of simpler funerals setting in during the twenty-five years or so before the American Revolution. Many planters who possessed both the means and the social position to warrant the fullest funeral observances were stipulating by will that they should be interred quietly and without great formality. These were men such as Thomas Lee of Westmoreland County who complained of the "indecent mirth" at funerals and asked that his burial service consist of only the church ceremony attended by those relatives and friends who were near and that a funeral sermon be preached in his parish church on some day other than that of the burial.

The specific instructions of such men, who as Charles Carter of Cleve said of himself, "never delighted in funeral pomps," are a valuable source of evidence for the type of simple funeral which they desired but also for the more prevalent funeral customs which they abhorred. Quite commonly they sought to introduce one or more of the following modifications in the traditional ceremonies:

1.) Keeping the burial portion of the ceremony private or nearly private. Thomas Lee's request on this score is mentioned above, and Charles Carter asked that his buria1 take place at night and be kept as private as possible. The usual request was, like that of Thomas Lee's, that attendance at the actual burial be held to relatives and near neighbors.

2.) Elimination of the funeral sermon. Not only was the sermon moved to another day from the interment; it was omitted altogether, much in keeping with modern Anglican practice. There are numerous examples of this (e.g., Philip Grymes of Middlesex County who requested "no funeral sermon—prayers only").

3.) Restrictions in the use of mourning clothes. This was so commonly asked that it seems safe to conclude that, even where the funeral remained rather elaborate, there was a general trend in the direction of simpler mourning observances. To some extent the non-importation agreements of the pre-Revolutionary era promoted this, since black ribbon and clothes probably had to be imported; but it was a movement that was well under way before 1765.

Charles Carter's will was very detailed in his instructions on mourning. He asked that only his children appear in mourning and that any other relatives should wear "Common Clothes, the men with a black Crape on their left arm and the women with a black knot on their left side…" He added, "I do positively forbid the putting of any of my servants in mourning, having always determined within myself as much as my power lay, by setting a proper example, to put a stop to the ridiculous custom of involving familys by pompous funerals and mournings… "

There are other examples, too. Philip Grymes wanted only his wife in mourning and only if she so chose. Mrs. Stith in her instructions for a very simple procession also mentioned that the pallbearers should have only black hatbands and gloves. And Philip Rootes of King and Queen County wanted none of his family to go into mourning.

4.) The use of common men as pallbearers. This sometimes occurred even at important funerals and may have been in reality a long-standing practice; for Sir John Randolph who was entombed in the Chapel of the Wren Building in 1737 had specified that his body should be carried by six poor house-keepers of Bruton Parish. One of the most interesting requests is that of Philip Rootes who wanted four of his Negro slaves as pallbearers.

Any attempt to describe a funeral of a Virginia plantation owner of the 1760's or 1770's must then really take into account two diverse characteristics, first of all, the traditionally elaborate ceremony attended by a large number of mourners, but, secondly, the increasing note of simplicity in the burial customs of the age. Depending upon which of these features received the greater emphasis a funeral scene laid in this time and place could show considerable variation in the size of the gathering and in the degree of formality observed and still retain its claim to authenticity.

The following outline, which follows a middle course between the divergent trends in funerals, suggests one possible example of a representative funeral of the period:

Attendance. Even if the funeral were represented as a fairly simple one, there should probably be a large number of people present — and a very varied cross-section of the rural population of Virginia. Besides the members of the family, there might be a number of men, obviously wealthy planters and of the same social class as the deceased, with their wives. As many, or perhaps even more, plainer people, representing the neighboring small farmers, and the slaves of the plantation should also be present. Then the clergyman and his clerk would complete the mourners.

Pallbearers. Even some of the really large funerals, such as that of Peyton Randolph mention only six pallbearers. Apparently four or six were the usual number in most cases. As some of the above examples have shown, these men could have ranged all the way from fellow planters to Negro slaves of the deceased.

Mourning dress. This is one of the details on which the greatest amount of variation is possible. The best description which we found is that of the very simple mourning requested by Charles Carter with all but the closest relatives in ordinary clothes, the men wearing black crape on their left arm and the women with a black knot on their left side. Mourning gloves for the pallbearers might also be depicted. Fuller discussion of mourning dress will require consultation with Mrs. Walsh, who is in charge of our Costuming Department.

Place of Burial. There is no problem here at all, as any attractive and well-landscaped plot either in the garden or elsewhere on the plantation served as a final resting place for the family.

Details of the funeral and burial. There could or could not be a sermon by the clergyman, but almost certainly he would read all, or portions of, the burial service from the English Prayer Book of 1662. His dress and that of the parish clerk, who also would probably be present, would have been as indicated above. If both the funeral and burial were being held, then there would have been a procession to the grave, joined by all the people present.

The funeral as a social gathering. If any sizeable number of people were present, then the fact that the sadness of the occasion was partly alleviated by its being in part a social gathering should not be overlooked. There would perhaps be a spread of food after the burial and a good deal of conversation among the people present.

Graveyard Symbolism A - F

ACORN

Immortality
As the seed of the oak, the acorn is a symbol of potential.

In Norse and Celtic culture, acorns symbolized life, fertility and immortality.Druids ate acorns, believing them to have prophetic qualities, and acorns were sacred to the god Thor, whose Tree of Life was the Oak.

Acorns and oak leaves form one of the circular "hex signs" used by the Amish and Mennonite communities of southern Pennsylvania, the various signs were believed to bestow favors such as protection or natural abundance.


* Oak Leaves & Acorn - Maturity, Ripe Old Age

ALPHA AND OMEGA

The Beginning and The End
Alpha and Omega are the first and last letters of the Greek alphabet. Symbolizing the beginning and the end.

The shape of Alpha is related to a pair of compasses - an attribute of god the creator, while Omega's shape is similar to a torch -- the fire of apocalyptic destruction.

The Christian symbol juxtaposing the two letters is derived from the book of Revelation: "I am Alpha and Omega, the beginning and the end, the first and the last". (Revelation 22:13).

ANCHOR

Early Christians used the anchor as a disguised cross, and as a marker to guide the way to secret meeting places. A Christian symbol of hope, it is found as funerary symbolism in the art of the catacombs. Often set amongst rocks. It can also be an occupational symbol in sea-faring areas or the attribute of Saint Nicholas, patron saint of seamen, symbolized hope and steadfastness. An anchor with a broken chain stands for the cessation of life.

ANGELS

The agent of God, often pointing towards heaven; guardians of the dead, symbolizing spirituality. Angels are shown in all types of poses with different symbolism.

• Two angels commonly identified by the objects they carry: Michael, who bears a sword and Gabriel, who is depicted with a horn.
• Blowing a trumpet (or even two trumpets) - Representing the day of judgment, and “Call to the Resurrection”.
• Carrying the departed soul - As a child in their arms, or as a Guardian embracing the dead. The messengers of god" are often shown escorting the deceased to heaven.
• Angel/Cherubim - Guardians of a sacred place, servants of God; divine wisdom or justice.
• Flying – Rebirth.
• Many angels gathered together in the clouds - Represents heaven.
• Angel Weeping - Grief, or mourning an untimely death.

BIRD IN FLIGHT

Bird in flight - These are symbolic of the "winged soul." The representation of the soul by a bird goes back to ancient Egypt. Some older burial art features only wings to convey the symbol of divine mission. Often denote the graves of children, eternal life.

BUTTERFLY

The soul
Although quite rare, it is occasionally seen on graves (most often of children). It is symbolic of the resurrection of Christ. The meaning is derived from the three stages of the life of the butterfly—the caterpillar, the chrysalis, and the butterfly. The three stages are symbols of life, death and resurrection. Short-life.

CROSSES

The ties between all religious beliefs and symbolism have always been strong. To the Christians the greatest symbolic message is in the crucifix. The crucifix or cross can generate many symbolic messages ranging from love, faith and goodness to terror and fear (e.g. the Ku-Klux-Klan’s use of the burning cross). There are many different types of Christian crosses worldwide, but only a handful is common in North America.

• Botonee Cross - So named because of its modified trefoil (three-lobed) ends, represents the trinity.
• Calvary Cross - A Latin cross standing on three steps or blocks, it signifies faith, hope and love. Love is sometimes replaced by charity.
• Celtic Cross - The circle around the crosspiece symbolizes eternity. It's origin can be traced to the Celtic cultures of the British Isles. There is a legend of how St. Patrick when preaching to some soon to be converted heathens was shown a sacred standing stone that was marked with a circle that was symbolic of the moon goddess. Patrick made the mark of a Latin cross through the circle and blessed the stone making the first Celtic Cross.
• Eastern Cross - Used in Orthodox (Russian/Greek) Christian Religions, this cross upper horizontal shoulder representing the inscription over the head of Jesus. The lower slanting shoulder represents the footrest of the crucified Jesus.
• Fleuree Cross/Gothic Cross - This flowered cross symbolizes the adult Christian by its more opened flared out ends.
• Greek Cross - It has four arms equal in length and is the traditional symbol of Christian faith. The equal length drawings of the cross is pre-Christian, and in paganism, represented the four elements—earth, air, fire and water. 
• Ionic Cross - Similar to the Celtic Cross, it's ends flair outward. The ionic cross signifies everlasting salvation, love and glory. The circle around the crosspiece symbolizes eternity.
• Latin Cross - One of the oldest symbols of Christianity and the most commonly used form, it is also the simplest in design. In early times, it was called god's mark.
• Latin Cross surrounded by circle or oval - Representing eternity or never-ending existence.

DOVE

The dove is most frequently depicted as holding an olive branch in its beak.  The dove also signifies purity and peace. The symbol of the dove with an olive branch is universally representative of peace.

 The dove is an appropriate symbol for burial markers as it also represents “the passing from one state or world to another.”  Across time, the sacred dove has been associated with funerary cults and was sacred to all Mother Goddesses, depicting femininity and maternity.

DOVE – DOUBLE HEAD

A double-headed dove, much like the double-headed eagle, signifies the dualnature of unity. The double-headed dove shown below appears to be part of anolder Masonic emblem which time has effectively erased. This symbol representsthe dual nature of unity and is also an imperial emblem of power and protection. According to the Association for Gravestone Studies, it also symbolizes a 32nd or 33rd degree Mason.

DRAGON

There are dramatically different interpretations in Eastern and Western cultures. In the Orient, the dragon protects humans from evil spirits and represents joy, health and fertility. But in Western cultures, the dragon possesses the negative traits of the snake, destruction, danger, depravity, and loss of innocence. In Jewish tradition, mythical beasts like the dragon are messianic creatures. Also, a dragon being defeated by St. George depicts triumph over sin.

EYE OF HORUS, EYE OF PROVIDENCE

Symbolizes the watchful eye of God.
A carved eye seen upon a gravestone, represents an omnipresent, all-seeing God. When the eye is enclosed within a triangle, the triangle is symbolic of the Holy Trinity; the Father, Son, and Holy Ghost.

This symbol first appeared in the west during the 17th and 18th centuries, as the Eye of Providence, depicting good fortune and prosperity, but representations of an all-seeing eye can be traced back to Egyptian mythology and the Eye of Horus.

FLOWERS

Flowers are often found in cemeteries not only as fresh offerings to departed members of the family or to friends but as carved images on headstones. Flowers are important symbols in many cultures, representing gods and goddesses, the soul and the spiritual flowering of the spirit, immortality and the brevity of life, and of course, rebirth. During the Festival of Rosalia in ancient Rome, roses were scattered over graves.

*  Roses

The rose has, as many symbols do, a dual nature. It has represented “heavily perfection as well as earthly passion.”  It also symbolizes both life and death, immortality and the limits of Time. As used in association with funeral traditions, the rose symbolizes eternal life and resurrection. In Christian lore, the rose grows on the Tree of Life, signifying regeneration and eternal life.